Proactive Interference in Couples’ Relationships – Mental Traffic Jam
Host: Dr. Stephanie Okolo
Date: August 1, 2025

What a powerful and thought-provoking session we had with Dr. Stephanie Okolo — a seasoned expert in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy — as she guided us through the complex terrain of emotional and mental interference in relationships.

The session unpacked the concept of proactive interference, a psychological term that describes how past experiences or information can hinder our ability to fully engage in the present. Within the context of romantic relationships, this becomes even more significant — as many individuals unknowingly carry emotional baggage, unresolved trauma, or mental patterns from past relationships into their current ones.

Dr. Okolo referred to this as a mental traffic jam — where old memories, comparisons, expectations, and fears collide with new possibilities, often disrupting intimacy, trust, and communication.

She emphasized that healing begins with awareness — recognizing that not every emotional reaction is rooted in the present moment. Sometimes, we are simply echoing our past.

This eye-opening session reminded us of the importance of giving our partners and ourselves the gift of a fresh start, free from the clutter of yesterday. Dr. Okolo encouraged us to practice emotional decluttering, honest communication, and mindfulness as tools to keep our minds and hearts open for genuine connection.

A truly needed message in a world where so many relationships suffer not because of the present — but because of an unresolved past.